eswareinmal | Always feel like she's runnin on a hamster wheel

Entry tags:

Always feel like she's runnin on a hamster wheel

Characters: Ginia Solana, Rupert Giles, and Helios Sprensonne
Open? No
Where: Schwanheim to the Two Faced Forest
When: Morning of RD 19
What: It's time to put a stop to Ginia's stealing spree and Helios and Giles know just how to do it.
Warnings: Violence and language

There was always a fall. A dark, crashing, downward spiral after the high, after the moment, after that fleeting feeling of success. Ginia knew there would be a fall and now that she was falling it was all she could do to slow her descent.

She barely slept after the heist, laying awake under a dark bridge, making sure no guards were coming after her, too jittery to sleep. Some of the books were safely with Liara, the other half left in the house - she couldn't call it a home, not anymore - as a sort of offering to Giles and Helios. They would know what to do with them, with the information hidden inside. Because even if she wasn't entirely herself anymore, the parts that hung on loosely still remembered her dearest friend and lover.

The morning came too quickly. She stole some pastries from the bakery, sating her hunger and her need to steal, but it wasn't enough. Nothing was anymore.

So when she sees a ring left carelessly on the ground, sun hitting the gold surface just right, Ginia pounces on it and hides it in a pocket, quickly seeing another shiny thing several yards away. That too, she went after. Once she was a thief, meticulous and almost masterful, now she was desperate and predictable.

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It's Giles' quick attack that saves him from another strike. With all the force behind it, the blow would make anyone stagger. She drops to her knees and supports herself on a hand, trying her best to breath again. She's still armed, but with both knees and a hand bound to the ground, it's a lost battle and she knows it. She's a broken Icarus, burned and blinded by her ambition and brought back down with broken wings.

Tears spill from her eyes, a mixture of pain, frustration, and even a bit of relief.

So much the better and the war is won when Ginia falls onto her knees and one hand. The sigil binds whatever part of her that's touching the dirt to the ground and her movements will be inhibited until the barrier breaks. Helios begins walking closer then his arm throbbing in obvious pain but his will and concentration remains fixed on the task at hand. Just a little bit more and this will be all over, just a quick slice of the knife and they can all go back home.

Or so he hopes. But there's no telling how things will turn out once this ends. The aftermath and all the pain Ginia will more than likely be in.

One quick slice. Or several slices. Giles is well past caring. He goes for the necklace, pulling the leather binding as far from Ginia's neck as he can to minimize the chance of doing her any further injury.

Then he cuts and saws for however long the material decides to hold out, and when it finally comes undone, he throws it into the woods.

This madness ends today. It has to - they've run out of tricks, and Ginia has nothing left to lose.

The cord may be simple leather, but it does its best to resist each strike of Giles' knife. However, leather is leather and eventually it gives, falling away.

It feels like a great weight lifting off Ginia's shoulders and body, but the weight of clarity and regret sinks into its place. Ginia stares at the ground, still bound in place by the spell, looking as if she's bowing in supplication. She is, though she knows none of it is deserved.

She robbed a city blind out of greet and excitement. She hurt her friends and threw away their attempts at helping. Even now she hurt the two closest to her and put them through so much misery.

The knife in her hand gives a tempting call of her own and she turns her head to regard the sharp blade, drops of blood staining the end. Skin yields to steel, always. It would be easy. A single slice through her neck, cutting away the marks left by the cursed necklace. It would be easy.

Her hand tightens around her knife. Then Ginia throws it away from her.

Helios is wavering in his place as he stands with that knife in his arm. He was so glad that it worked. Gods everything was fine now. Everything would be fine now and they can put all of this behind them. He fought back the burning sensation of tears as he continued to walk slowly towards the two of them. His concentration and his strength was giving out. The wavering flickering of the barrier making it that more clearly. He'll slump to the ground for a few moments as the barriers light flickers and then dies down to a faint glow. The light escaping from the circle like it was something from a campfire. And then a small little 'pop' will break the silence and the barrier will dissipate in the blink of an eye.

They did. It was over.

It's over. It's all over. Ginia can get back to being Ginia, and they can all go home.

The dying of the light within the circle is his first warning. By the time the barrier "pop"s out of existence, Giles is already moving. He grabs his discarded cloak from the ground and sets to work with his knife, cutting a section of it into strips.

"That, um...th-that arm needs looking at."

Dimly, he's aware that the cut on his cheek is still bleeding freely. But, especially compared to Helios' injuries, it's not a life threatening hit.

It's over. It's finally over.

For Ginia, the horror has only begun. Even with the binding spell gone, Ginia remains transfixed, curling onto herself and steeping in the horror or her actions. She can hear Giles tend to Helios, both of them who she injured.

Still avoiding looking at them, she slowly rises and goes to retrieve her knife. She scrubs the metal on the grass - she'll clean it properly later - before she sheaths it again. Without a word to either of them, and secretly hoping they haven't noticed, Ginia begins to walk deeper into the forest.

Helios only notices because he's trying not to look at his arm. The pain is almost unbearable at this point, but he makes an effort to not make a sound. He moves then with another whimper of pain threatening to escape his throat.

"W-Wait. G-Ginia." His voice is laced with pain and anguish. He tries to turn in his position, tries to motion for Giles to move away and go to her. That he'll be fine and Ginia is far more important at this moment right now, because if she leaves she might never come back.

"G-Go s-stop her f-first." He'll be fine, really. And his look back at Giles says that clearly in his eyes. If she leaves now this might have all been for nothing anyway. The forest was far too dangerous to go into especially with the oncoming night fast approaching.

Giles stumbles to a stop, and looks back at where Helios is indicating. Looks back at where his chance to get Ginia back is leaving with her.

He looks at her, and then back at Helios, and then back to Ginia again, torn between the two most important people in his life.

But the look in Helios' eyes tells him that the other man won't submit to any kind of care until Ginia is back. It's almost a reassuring thought, really, and it's enough for Giles to linger just long enough to pass over his cloak to staunch the bleeding before he turns and runs for Ginia.

"Stop," he pleads - he's not too proud to beg, not anymore, not to her. "Ginia, please, stop. T-Talk to us."

And then, because he's desperate even if it is a dirty, underhanded blow: "Help me."

Getting Helios back to the house and taking care of his arm is going to be more than a one person job.

Talk? No, there's nothing really left to say. She can't even find the words to apologize, though she wants to. An apology now would be hollow, nowhere near what she wants to say, what she needs to do to make things up to them. But Ginia knows she can't leave, not after they've pleaded for her to stay.

Ginia turns to face Giles, but doesn't meet his eyes. She focuses on the cut on his cheek, the slow drip of blood on his skin. She looks past him at Helios, scraps of cloth around his bleeding arm. Stay. Help. After all she's done, she can't imagine why they still want her around. But she can help them back to their home, then from there...

Her knife comes out again as Ginia heads over to a tree. She slices down some vines and goes over to Helios, binding the bandages in place.

Helios breath hitches when he finally yanks out the knife in his arm. He blinks back tears as he applies pressure to the wound. The bloody knife lays motionlessly on the ground at his feet and he startles slightly when Ginia comes over. His breathing just a bit uneven as he battles with himself to keep his composure. And then when she wraps the few vines around his arm to keep the crude bandaging in place, Helios manages to look up at her and take her hand in his oddly warm one. The blood being the main factor to that sensation.

"It's n-not your f-fault." His voice is barely above a whisper as he speaks those words. But they are said no less sincere from him. This wasn't her fault and they all knew it. This was just like the masks on Halloween, it wasn't any different when one thought about it.

"No, it's not," Giles says quietly, as he comes back to join the two of them again. His hand finds Ginia and Helios', and gives both a quick squeeze before he goes to work trying to straighten out the binding on Helios' arm further, adding in a bit more padding around the vines.

"It...it wasn't even you, really."

Of that, he's been certain of for a while.

Now that the adrenaline is finally wearing off, Giles is remembering that he's bleeding. And he's realizing that it hurts...but, not so much that he can't ignore it, and so he tries to.

He's afraid of me, Ginia realizes with a sadness and shame when she sees Helios start, unable to read his action in any other way. Yet how could he be any other way? She terrorized and hurt him. Even as they say, insist, it wasn't her fault and take her hands, Ginia wants to rebel against the show of love and care. It's undeserved and it burns.

Why? Why do you care? Why are you doing this? She wants to ask, but her hands are trapped in theirs and even if they were free, she's not sure she'd be able to find the signs. When Giles releases her hand, she quickly drops her own. With shame, she picks her knife off the ground. Yet another weapon stained with the blood of one she cares about. The siren song or death rings in her ears again as she stares at the sharp tip.

Because, to her shame, she knows she enjoyed the rush stealing gave her. It was a decadent high that could be compared to little else. It was a dangerously sweet taste of her old life, one she missed no matter how many times she tried to walk away from it.

/We should go-/ she finally signs, stopping short before signing "home." Their home, yes, but her's? /-now./

Helios nods as he shakily and wobbles to his feet. It almost looks like he's about to collapse again but he steadies himself. A shake sigh passes his lips and he gives a small smile. He'll cradle his injured arm against his chest as he looks back at the town.

"Y-Yes we-we should." There's the unspoken all three of us there. Because it was their home, all three of theirs, and he's sure Giles can make Ginia see that. If anyone can he could.

All three of them. Because, if it's not all three of them, it might as well be none of them.

They've crossed the boundaries of worlds to be together. If Giles has any say in it, they won't be parting here.

He remembers the necklace of silver and emerald, safely tucked away in the very bottom of his bag. He has to give it to her. He hadn't foreseen Helios getting so badly wounded in the bargain, though - that has to be tended to. But, as long as he needs help, Giles trusts that Ginia will stay with him.

"I'll, um...why don't you let me try the sigil this time, Helios?" he asks quietly. "I've...well, um, I've seen you do it a dozen times by now."

And he has the blood to spare.

As much as she hates herself, as much as every line in her body begs to run and flee and banish herself, her love for them keeps her at their side. Until Helios and Giles are back at the house, she'll stay at their side. Even the most wild dog understands loyalty.

She begins to protest, but draws herself back. Even if she has the most blood to spare and by all rights should offer some, she lacks the magical power needed for the spell. So Ginia holds herself back and offers a tiny nod in agreement with Giles.

They've been through far too much together to have something like this to part them. But, time, time is a very important factor when it comes to these things. Helios knows how Ginia is feeling, they all do, because they've been there. And isolating oneself is not going to make any of this easier.

"If-if you w-want to." Helios doesn't really have a choice in this, does he? He shifts a little as he nods.

He doesn't - in the state he's in, even getting back to the house would almost certainly put Helios unconscious. No, Giles needs him awake, and as alert as he can possibly be.

Most importantly, he needs the help.

Giles kneels down on the ground. He takes off his bag, and sets it at his side. Then, after a second's further pause, he gives it a nudge towards Helios.

"Watch that, would you?" he asks, glancing up at his friend. The flap closing the bag has shifted just enough for Helios to be able to see the necklace glittering in it.

Might as well take the chance now. He gives Helios a slight nod of encouragement, before gathering some blood on his fingertips and beginning to pain the grass.

With nothing else for her to do, Ginia watches. She watches their surroundings to make sure no one stumbles upon them, though they are far enough into the forest that no one would reasonably stumble upon them. She watches the sky, too blue, clear, and happy for her liking. She watches Giles draw out the needed sigils, doing her best to commit each sign to memory in case there's a day where she can and will need to draw the sigils herself.

And she looks down at the bag, catching only a glimmer of silver. Her stomach twists and she pales as she remembers all the riches she stole. Even now her pockets were full of illicitly gained gems, coins, and jewelry. She'll have to return everything in some way.

And Helios looks back at Giles with a vague smile. He flips open the bag and takes out the necklace with its sliver skin and brilliant green emeralds. It glints in the sunlight as he holds it in his good hand. He looks back at Ginia and holds it a bit closer to her.

"It-it's for you. Giles p-picked it out. I-I just...put on some finishing t-touches." Helios gives the other man a smile as he holds it out to Ginia then, his hand slightly shaking still.

"It-it's much better looking than-than that o-other one, don't you th-think Giles?" Helios manages a truer smile that time.

"We thought you, um...m-might want a different sort of necklace, after all of this is over," Giles adds softly. He doesn't look up from his work, but he wears a faint, slightly hopeful smile, as he remembers his and Helios' work together, all for the sake of this necklace and this moment.

"Of course, um, in, in terms of his 'finishing touches'...well, um, Helios is being modest as always."

She'll see when she puts it on.

Besides - maybe being given something, friend to friend, will help. Ginia doesn't have to take anymore. She never did, of course, but now that she's herself again, perhaps she can see that for herself.

Against what they might have been expecting, Ginia coils at the first sight of the silver and emerald necklace. No. No, no more jewels, no more gems. No no no. Was this some kind of cruel trick? A trap? They already used the necklace once to lure her in. Logic regains control, reminding her they had no reason to trap or trick her, and that whatever they might have done in the morning was only to bring her back to her senses.

Still, Ginia continues to hesitate as she looks at the necklace. The mere sight of such finery makes her feel ill, but refusing such a gift would be rude and only hurt them more. Swallowing down her nervousness, guilt, and a bit of bile, she reaches out for the necklace and puts it on.

"Thank you," Ginia whispers, the words leaving her lips out of a gut reaction, and it takes her a moment to realize those were her words from her own mouth. There had been such a necklace before, a much plainer one, in a village nestled in a forest. She swallows, holding back her tears and the burst of emotion, allowing another word to escape instead.

"Why?"

Helios didn't expect her to do that, but he should have known. He looks at her sadly and with understanding as she takes it slowly, tentatively, seeing much of himself in her at the moment. It's only when she asks 'why' that he looks away. His own eyes burn a little because seeing her like this was truly unpleasant and he wished something like this would never have happened. But this world was filled with things they couldn't understand and couldn't really control. If anything Ginia was a victim in all of this as well.

"Because. That's what f-friends...no, f-family, that's what family does for one another. Isn't it?" They would not leave her because they were family and that word rolls off his tongue easily as he gives her a warm smile. They were all in this together after all and a cursed necklace was not going to impede on what they had.

"Because it was something good we could do for you, in the past. And if we could do so for you again...why wouldn't we?

We are...w-we are family, after all."

He didn't need to look up to see her reaction. The subtle changes in the air, the shifting of her body, the trembling in her returned voice...that had told Giles all he needed.

"And...and because I, I love you, and...and I've missed you, almost m-more than I could bear. W-We both have."

And any pain he endures from this fight, well, Giles sees it as just and fitting recompense for having to use such force against her. For her own good, maybe...but that hadn't made it easy to hurt her.

"...it's not the first time one of us has gotten caught up in a curse."

Helios still has the scars to prove that.

"I love you too. Both of you." Ginia's words still come as soft whispers because it's all she can do to keep herself composed. Anything louder and she knows she'll break and it wouldn't be fair to have the two of them take care of her. So she keeps everything contained, remembering again how easy it is to let everything spill out when words are so easy.

Her hands wring together and she holds them in front of her mouth, trying to find the words to say. It was a curse, but it was more than that. It preyed on her skills, her need for excitement, molded and shaped her until she lost sight of what she was.

She lost control. For the first time in years, for the first time since Alice's disappearance, she lost control.

"...It won't be the last, will it." Dour words, but truthful words edged with fear. It wasn't like an experiment, almost predictable depending on the time of year and from past patterns. Nothing was predictable here, and yet everything was. The laws of fairy tales. Things didn't change much between stories.

Ginia knows she should have known better and that bit of knowledge kills her the most.

Edited 2012-09-12 07:47 (UTC)

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