eswareinmal | This house is full of stories we both told

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This house is full of stories we both told

Characters: Ginia Solana and Rupert Giles, later with Ginia Solana and Helios Sprensonne
Open? No.
Where: A bookstore in the city, later a bakery.
When: The morning of 11th of Rebirth's Decline
What: A hero learns her fate and it's not a good one.
Warnings: PG for likely language and discussions of death.

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/She's gone,/ Ginia signs again, suddenly aware Giles is the third person she's ever told this too and she falters slightly as she tries to find the words to explain everything. /All the conditioning, the training, all the things that made her, they fell apart years ago. Three, four years ago. She's gone. Or maybe not gone, I remember some of the things she does./

Her head drops, suddenly afraid to look at him and see his reaction. She knows Alice and him were never close, really only cautious and begrudging allies at best, but however he might react to the news, it scares her. However, she also knows there's a lot she could tell to scare him.

/...It's been five years, Giles. I'm 37./ On the bright side, it does close the age gap somewhat.

He lets out his breath, all in a rush, sagging slightly against her. Five years. Yes. That...that looked about right. Just from looking at her...that looked about right.

That sinks in before he can truly process the realities of Alice being 'gone'. Alice is just something he'd come to accept about Ginia, a difficulty and a quirk that were part and parcel of loving her. Give time, though...he'll be happy.

"...you've aged well."

It's a lie, she looks five years older than that just from stress. But it's a lie looks like it might help, if only a bit.

"...I missed you. And, and...I'm glad you're back."

That, of course, was the utter truth.

It's a lie and she knows it. It's only been five years but it might as well have been ten. There's peace in living out a quiet life as a waitress in Santa Fe, but there's also the stress of maintaining a secret identity and being on the run from your government. Death also has a way of adding on a few years.

Still, she smiles a little because the thought helps.

/...I missed you too. And I'm glad to be here./ Because the unknown after death scares her. Is there an afterlife? Heaven or Hell or some peaceful resting place? Or is it only nothingness to follow? Or is death simply another world and another chance at living?

/Do you still love me?/ It's only been minutes for him, but five years for her and she needs that reassurance and extra bit of stability.

Even in a world where it's a known, confirmed fact that there is an afterlife, a myriad of different heavens and hells...well, death is still the ultimate uncertainty, and that uncertainty had nearly driven Giles mad at one point. It had also driven him to make a deal with a death goddess. Nearly dying all over again in exchange for knowing...he still thought he'd come out ahead, in that particular arrangement.

One day, he'd know for certain. Until then? He could only hope that he'd done enough to redeem himself and escape a hell dimension for all eternity.

Ginia's answer, therefore, is a hug so tight that it's as though Giles is trying to keep her with him by sheer force of will. Really, on a certain level, he is.

"More than ever."

Truer words he has never spoken.

His hug is almost enough to squeeze all the air out of her. He's a strong man too and it almost hurts a little, but it keeps her grounded. Ginia wraps her arms around him and holds him tight, face resting against his shoulder. It's a cruel question to ask before certain statements, but even if he leaves after, at least she still had that last moment of love. A silly, selfish thought, but one needs to be a little selfish in order to survive.

But maybe if he did leave, it would be better for him.

She kisses him. A light kiss from someone who has forgotten how to be tender and loving and is doing her best to ease back into that role. Her hands cup his face and she rests her forehead against his.

She has to tell him. He has to know. It would be leading him on otherwise.

Ginia pulls back and looks at him, taking a deep breath before signing two words that change everything.

/I died./

Giles knows how to read sign language. He learned it thanks to the Council. And why not? It was a useful skill to have, a good, solid method of communication if a situation arose where speaking aloud might put them all in danger.

Giles knows how to read sign language.

But when he sees those two words, he wonders if he's forgotten. Because what he's reading them to mean...it isn't right. It can't be right. He must be seeing wrong, understanding wrong...it can't really be...

Giles lets out his breath in what sounds like a sob. He hates himself for showing even that little of how those two words rip his heart to pieces, but there's only so much he can keep back in the face of that. The urge to turn away just so she doesn't see his face is overpowering...but, instead, he just hugs her again, gently and tenderly this time, as though she'll break to pieces if he's not careful.

He doesn't say anything, but that's because he's trying not to cry. But he'll pull away after a few seconds, so she can say something if she wants. At suck close proximity, he doesn't think he'll miss anything even if he takes his glasses off to clean the dust of the store away.

Ginia knows she can't leave it at that, even if the truth is too much to bear. But she owes him the truth and she owes sparing him nights of endless wondering how she might have died or what happened because she knows what those nights are like.

Her expression hardens as she pulls herself together to share her story, the signs spilling from her fingers before now there's nowhere else to go. Keeping them in will only kill her more and right now she needs someone to help carry her burden for her.

/Project Whitecap, they were the group that... experimented on me while I was in the hospital. They made Alice, tested all sorts of things on us. Someone tried to speak out against them, went to the media, told everyone that would listen. He disappeared and the government covered everything up, then came after anyone who was in the project.

They tried to kill me, but I escaped. Faked my death and spent a few years laying low in Santa Fe. No one knew who I was, no one had to know. But an old friend... he ran into me. He was hiding from Whitecap, him and a sixteen-year-old./

She grit her teeth in anger. After so many months of running, it felt so good being able to spill everything out to someone else. Jack knew all her anger and agreed, but it felt good being able to purge out all her frustration and hatred toward those who ran her country. /They were experimenting on children. Teenagers, children, turning them into soldiers, into assassins. They were always children picked up off the streets or from the hospital, people no one would ever miss. Natalie was only sixteen and already as good a shot as I was. Natalie wasn't even her real name, it was the background they imprinted on her.

/I helped them escape. I had to. We spent months avoiding them, never staying in one place for long, but we could only keep it up for so long. Between Natalie and me, they would never stop coming after us. So I sent them off to Taiwan where some old contacts could hide them and I brought them time in the airport./

Her hands clenched into fists and her head dropped down. She could see it clearly, the agents coming after them, her and her stash of weapons alone. A final desperate fight on the tarmac. Giving into her deathseeker ways? Perhaps.

/I don't remember how many I took down. But the plane got away. I did all I could for them. I don't regret that./

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This house is full of stories we both told

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